moving towards spring
I can’t believe that february is almost over. I made it with out wanting to crawl into a hole and hide away. Usually I cant stand february. Last year, I swore I was going to leave for the whole month, but that did not happen.
Last night I taught a beginning flow workshop, and it was fun, mellow and had a good vibe. It was much smaller than I had hoped for, but I plan to do more of these mini workshops, and will do more to put the word out. I tend to fall short in terms of promoting myself and what I do, even though I love what I do and want to share it with as many people as possible.
There is this tentative part of me that doubts my efforts. This is true in my art as well as my teaching, and perhaps a few other areas. It is much bigger and deeper than i thought, but I am ready to give this up, because it does not make me happy, it keeps me closed and shut off, and feeling sorry for myself. I think people pick up on this, whether they know it or not. I am not quite sure how to remedy this, scratch that. Of course, I do, it is through changing my thoughts around this, combined with patients, and love (inner love that is). The thing is, that I want it to change instantly, and be as great as I think I should be. Whack on the head is the habitual response, but that is the little ego, and we know what a loud voice it has. I will just have to keep working with her, love her and redirect my thoughts, as many times as necessary.
So spring is coming, and will be here before you know it, with fresh life and energy, waking up to new beginnings. I am excited, and am ready for the flowers to open along with me.