arline jernigan

I am quite ready for a shift in energy, and though I am not surly and self deprecating (as much), I am feeling tension in my mind, and restlessness.

I don’t like it, but I have to accept where I am, and who I am. I have to accept what I was given in my life, and work with that, or be with that, or what ever.

I did have a great interaction with my mentor Fred (art dad) yesterday. He continues to teach me things all of the time. He is a gifted and dedicated teacher. He is demanding and firm, but not harsh (except when it is the best approach).

I have been saying over and over that I want to draw from the figure, and put the figure back into my paintings.

“WHY”? He asked. “It does not seem to me that that is really what you want to do, and your surfaces are much more important to you than anything.”

This is true. but I love to draw, and I told him this, and that people seem to like my figurative work better.

he said “If I hear that you are working just to please others, than I am never coming over here again”. “You do what comes from your heart”.

Draw from life, but do it in your sketch book, or integrate it, but don’t make it your focus”, don’t listen to others, hell don’t listen to me,” “but you did ask.”

I said “yes I did, because I have felt stuck, well, paralyzed”.

He told me that my surfaces were beautiful, rich and deep, but that I could definitely explore color more, and offered me a few suggestions, that I welcomed gladly. He has always encouraged me to draw, because that is a strength of mine, and I asked him about this, because I thought it meant that I had to draw from life or imagine something and draw from that. He told me that I was putting limitations on drawing, and he pointed to the text that was emerging from my work (I have been writing on my paintings more than ever lately), and said, “this is drawing, it has movement, interest and life.” “you should bring your yoga into your painting, and not limit yourself”.

THAT IS WHAT I WANT TO DO>>> “SO DO IT ARLINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“OK, and no more comparing, that is debilitating, it does not serve you. You are who you are, find the joy in that”.

That is tricky for me. But I am willing to surrender, accept and be with who and what i am (deep breath, in every aspect). This is something I tell my students all of the time. My classes are designed around different perspectives, and changing flows. Trust is necessary, they are challenging, and there is no room for ego chatter.

Sometimes we need to learn, in the deepest way, what we teach.

Here in lies the truth.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 26th, 2007 at 6:17 am and is filed under Journal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.