arline jernigan

I had a very interesting dream last night. It started off rather disturbing, but shifted into something else completely.

In my dream, I was peacefully sleeping, and very comfortable. Then I was awakened by some voices. I could not move, I could not open my eyes, but I was fully conscious. Whomever these voices belonged to, took my covers and wrapped them around me so tightly, that if I were to wake up fully, I could not move. They spoke in a conversational tone, yet I could not understand what they were saying. Then there was laughter, and I knew that it was about me. I was trapped, and felt powerless. I did not know what was happening, and was finding it hard to breathe. Finally I lost consciousness and then passed out.

Next thing I remember, an extremely poisonous person appeared in front of me, wanting something. He wanted part of my soul, and was unrelenting in his demand for it. he tried many tactics, and at first I was very tempted to give myself over. Though something deep inside refused to let this happen. It was like a tornado of light came up from the deepest part of me, moved out, and surrounded me with this protection and insight.

He became angry and started to use some evil magic. Out of his chest came a horrible murky cloud, that carried a foul stench. It was full of rancor, and made me wretch.

I closed my eyes, fell into the most peaceful state, and I breathed this essence in, and somehow surrendered completely. The light inside and out was too much for the cloud, and it disappeared, then so did he.

After that, everything around me began to fall away, and I was left alone in this warm glow. I just lay there and embraced my freedom and peace, then it was only light.

I had a dream last night that he climbed through my window, it was very very late. He was crying, penitent for all of the sadness that he brought into my world. He professed his undying perennial love for me, and this left me feeling very confused.

At first I wanted to take care of him, to assuage his guilt and remorse, as well as believe him. At the same time there was a voice of a very angry woman in the background, screaming actually. She wanted peace, and was enraged that her sleep had been disrupted, and was not going to tolerate such flagrant disrespect. Then I looked to the boy, in a mans body, that was sitting next to me, and I detached. I saw things so clearly. There was no love here.

I told him that I appreciate his affection, but I would no longer be needing it. I told him that I want a higher love, from one that honors and respects, and whom I can honor and respect.

The tears turned into an ocean, and I was floating in it without a raft. He disappeared, and I was alone, but not scared, only unsure of where I was going in this open fluid expansive space.