here I am again
The other day, I was having a conversation with someone about rules. The topic came up, because I had a situation at the airport, where the day I was to leave, was incorrect , and I missed my plane. It was a mistake that I did not catch when I made my reservations, so I had to call a number, to be greeted by an irritated and unfriendly person. When I explained my situation, she said, “now how did YOU mess up the reservations again?” Of course my horns started to emerge, I wanted to tear into her, but luckily my friend Jason was there to offer support, and I was able to stay grounded (for the most part).
There are so many rules at the airport, and they keep adding more. You can’t you can’t you can’t, is the message it seems, and some people are sticklers, who do not want to help, even when they can.
I got home, and I had to pay to do so, about as much as the trip cost in the first place, but I suppose it could have been worse.
I am on the opposite side when it comes to rules set by others. I have a very difficult time with these rules, even if they make sense. I seem to rebel, even when I don’t really need to. I do fine with guidelines, because guidelines provide space.
I am learning how to embrace certain rules though, because yesterday, I found myself downtown at 201 Poplar, in traffic court. I had let my tags expire> AGAIN <. This is something that I have done over and over and over. Not only do I let my tags expire, I try and scheme my way out of the trouble I have gotten myself in. FOR WHAT!?!
This is a pattern. It boils down to me not wanting to take responsibility for my actions. It must change.
While I was standing there with the hundred other people in line (I got there early and still had to wait 45 minutes), I had to laugh at myself. I thought “here I am again” , now it is time to move forward, you don’t need to visit this place anymore.
Everything worked out perfectly when I made the decision to take care of business. I got my car to inspection and it passed, I got my tags renewed, and I reorganized my schedule, so that I would not miss any classes. There was really no pain involved, and I got to see something that made me grateful for my practice of yoga and meditation. Those practices give me strength and wisdom to not react to my world, as well as deal what life offers. And not only that, now I can drive with out dodging the police ;)
I am still working on the rules that I place on myself, however. These are the toughest, and here I can be a very strict master. I am learning though, how to be more flexible with myself, and I notice that when I do that, the world I live in is more flexible. It is pretty cool like that.
Have a fun day : ), I am going to.