Peace
I feel like I have been approaching things with a certain amount of intensity, that creates unease. It is not something that I set out to do, it just seems to happen when I am uncertain about things.
I finally relaxed for a second, and found some peace in my spinning mind. Meditation has been at once helpful in my ability to calm the mind, while showing me patterns, that no longer work for me.
I am learning about faith and trust, as I have said in other posts. Now I am throwing patients in the mix, because the things I don’t want in my mind and life anymore, can hold on hard, or rather, I, in a deep way, hold on to them. This seems silly, but the comfort of familiarity (even if it is ugly) wants to over ride the discomfort of change, and the effort that change takes.
I tend to want things I am working on, to be instant. Some change or growth comes fast, and sometimes it seems to crawl. If I am honest, I want to sometimes change, and not put any effort into doing things or thinking differently.
I remembered that the things in my life, are happening, because I have brought them to me. Yes, it is about taking responsibility in a very creative way.
If I am stuck in an old pattern of thinking for example, it is because a part of me is not wanting to leave the “comfort” zone. In that old zone, I can feel like a victim, and blame blame blame.
No thank you. I would rather take a deep look, and see what is really going on in my mind.
Usually there is an answer or a solution to every unwanted circumstance, and once I sit still and breathe my thoughts aside, I can find insight to the nature of things, and find space for new thinking and new experiences.
Even though my mind wanders, and loves distraction, I intend to keep bringing it back into focus.
The focus is clarity, healing, freedom, creativity, love, connection, expression, joy and peace, no matter what is going on, and no matter how uncertain things seem to be.
April 17th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
Yes, be patient with her. All those things you want that are different will come, and even though it would be nice to have them this instant, and always, take a breath, and keep on loving yourself. Patience is a wonderful gift, allowing a sense of ease to come in your transitions. If she responds to things in a way that is less desirable to you, because it is OK, it is just a response to something that wasn’t working in the past. Try asking your higher self why you chose it. You are so empowered by taking responsibility for everything… when my higher self answers the question and I determine what it is I wanted to learn from it, I feel like all is right in the world. You are conscious, wonderful, so ahead of the game!
April 17th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
It is so interesting to me, how concepts can be floating around before I actually embody them.
Like listening to the deep parts of myself, and actually honoring what is there, like it or not, has only just recently become something that I could do.
I believed in the idea, but > for someone else < Make sense?
I think I want things NOW sometimes, without really considering what that means.
We have to be ready for change, and on all levels.
It feels so good to take responsibility, then I have the freedom to learn.
It’s amazing and cool. :)